Deception and DNOW

There is a picture that has stirred quite a debate on the internet.

Yes, world, I am finally attempting cultural relevance beyond a hashtag.

What I find fascinating is that even though there are clearly objective measures that the dress is black and blue (both because it is a dress that you can buy online and because Adobe is magic and can tell us the color of things), there are still people debating on what color it is.  The truth is there, and depending on your internet speed, very quickly found, but people are more apt to believe what they see rather than seek out the truth.

That is very much what this past weekend's messages were about.

Disciple NOW at Stetson was an eye-opening weekend for me, to say the least.  The band that came out of Orlando (Become Ministry) did a great job leading the kids and adults in seeking God through song, and they also went out of their way to connect with the students.  Super super awesome.  The speaker (Harris III) used illusions to help show Biblical truths.  I took a lot out of the weekend, but the messages that struck me the most were the ones about identity.

You see, I don't know what I'm supposed to do with my life.  But there were so many moments this weekend that struck me directly between the eyes, particularly with the specific language used.  I am at a huge crossroads in my life.  I have the opportunity to make intentional choices for Christ as I reattach my identity.  I am not convinced that I am meant to continue to just do the same thing I've "always" done (because, you know, by the time you're 26 you've already figured the recipe for your life).  God has gifted me greatly, and I am meant to use those gifts to influence the community around me.  But what is God's dream for my life?

The last year and a half of my life was pretty well defined by taking care of a sick person.  And I can say it was absolutely my calling for that time.   But now I've been wrestling with the whole "God taught me how to love through her, and now it's time to love HIM like that" for the past 3 weeks now.  And then this past weekend to hear about the opportunity for a new identity, knowing that right now a good chunk of who I made myself be is gone.  I've had to be this other me, this old guy who buys houses and drives to doctor's appointments and separates out pills, who goes and makes the money and makes sure everything is set for security, who is trapped in a routine of life that isn't bad, but it isn't really life.  And a great fear, of losing Cam, came true.  But the bigger fear, and the thing that was slowly happening, was losing myself in her.  I was called to love her, but not more than I love God.  I didn't do a good job of that.  But now I have a second chance. Again.

So I'm seeking out what's next for me.  I have taken some steps in a particular direction (and some people would call me crazy) but until I have some more details I will refrain from saying too much.  But there is a place for me to be a living sacrifice.  The other truth is that sometimes I feel like we put so much emphasis on "Is this where I'm supposed to be?" rather than "What am I supposed to do while I am here?" and so I've got to avoid that trap.  I'm here for now, and I can see where I can be more like Christ in my sphere of influence.

I've never really asked God to lead me like this before.  Opportunities presented themselves, and I've taken them.  I can easily see now that God was in control of them.  But I believe He is asking me to start seeking.  To open my mind to the endless possibilities that are in the world.  There are so many places to serve and people that need Christ, and no one person can do it all.  So what is it that  I am supposed to do?

Well. . . stay tuned. :)

God's Not Dead

After teaching four-year old students worship songs, I am convinced we are designed to worship. I don’t know if it’s mimicry in them seeing me as I teach and sing the song, but there was one particularly cute kid today that, if all you did was look at his face, you knew he was singing about something greater than himself. I don’t know how to explain it. But when you see something authentic, that’s something special. I tried to record him with my phone but by the time I got it out the song was almost over. Also my phone’s camera is super super not awesome. 


Anyway.

The songs I’ve been teaching my kids since I returned to work have been ministering to me. I got this musical sample packet that has some more contemporary yet common worship songs, and the arrangements are pretty fresh sounding (for elementary kids anyway) so I thought I would use those songs, since they are on the radio and many of the kids recognized them when I played them.

But man. The lyrics. Thank you God.


Let hope arise and make the darkness hide. My faith is week, I need a resurrection.

Let Heaven roar and fire fall. Come, shake the ground with the sound of revival! 


My God’s not dead, He’s surely alive. AND He’s living on the inside!

In this time of desperation, when all we know is doubt and fear, there is only ONE foundation.

Let our faith be more than anthems, greater than the songs we sing.

In the here and now, let love invade.

And the gates of hell will not prevail for the power of God has torn the veil.

We KNOW Your love will never fail. We believe!

Higher than the mountains that I face. Stronger than the power of the grave.

CONSTANT in the trial and the change.

My debt is paid; there’s nothing that can separate my heart from Your great love!

Your love never fails, it never gives up. It never runs out on me!


So much great truth in those words.

Still going to post about DNOW weekend.  Maybe tonight if I'm still an insomniac after rehearsal.

Grieving: A Biblical View

I haven't written here in a long, long time. And a lot has gone on. For those that may be reading this and not know what's going on, the briefest of reviews: I married the love of my life a little over a year ago as she battled cancer for the second time. She got a bone marrow transplant last May which unfortunately led to an infection this past January that took her life on February 2nd.

I will preface the rest of this post by saying: I don't have it all together.  I've been angry, confused, sad, detached, and there's no rhyme or reason, and just when I think I have figured out the "cycle" of emotions something else happens.  But this morning there was inspiration, so I grabbed it and this is what came of it.

In having conversations with the various people in my life, there is one Scripture that I have held on to in the back of my head:

 But we do not want you to be uninformed, brothers, about those who are asleep, that you may not grieve as others do who have no hope. For since we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so, through Jesus, God will bring with him those who have fallen asleep. For this we declare to you by a word from the Lord, that we who are alive, who are left until the coming of the Lord, will not precede those who have fallen asleep. For the Lord himself will descend from heaven with a cry of command, with the voice of an archangel, and with the sound of the trumpet of God. And the dead in Christ will rise first. Then we who are alive, who are left, will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air, and so we will always be with the Lord. Therefore encourage one another with these words.  (1 Thessalonians 4:13-18) 

There is an important word right at the beginning; it says that we don't grieve like those without hope. But what is hope? How do we get it? Well, hope in the Godly sense is this: the certainty of the fulfillment of God's promises. That statement in and of itself is worth exploring, but for now I'll just leave this reference from Romans 8-

For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us. For the creation waits with eager longing for the revealing of the sons of God. For the creation was subjected to futility, not willingly, but because of him who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be set free from its bondage to corruption and obtain the freedom of the glory of the children of God. For we know that the whole creation has been groaning together in the pains of childbirth until now. And not only the creation, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies. For in this hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience. 

Our hope is that this world is not the end all, and that God is reaching out to us, showing us His love, wanting us to accept our imperfection and realize we can't be good enough or do enough and that we need the blood of Christ to be seen as righteous so that God will accept us (based on Christ and not ourselves) so that we will spend our time on earth living a life filled instead of a life empty and that, when we reach the end of life or eternity comes that we will spend it with God.

But where does hope come from? This is what I've been researching this morning. And this is what I have found: Joy and peace (fruit of the Spirit) precede hope (which, if you didn't click on the link, hope is not on that list of Spiritual fruit).

Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured our his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us. Romans 5:1-5 

(Also, just good stuff: In the future we will become but until then we must overcome. This means we will experience difficulties that help us grow. We rejoice in suffering not because we like pain or deny its tragedy, but because we know God is using life's difficulties and Satan's attacks to build our character. The problems that we run into will develop our perseverance- which in turn will strengthen our character, deepen our trust in God, and give us greater confidence about the future. -Study Bible footnote)

"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." Romans 15:13

Meyer says joy is "the consciousness of the divine love, and thereby the certainty of blessedness, the triumph over all sufferings, etc." And in speaking of rejoicing from Phillipians 4:4- "Paul desires joyfulness at all times on the part of the believer, to whom even tribulation is grace (Php 1:7; Php 1:29) and glory (Romans 5:3), and in whom the pain of sin is overcome by the certainty of atonement (Romans 8:1); to whom everything must serve for good (Romans 8:28; 1 Corinthians 3:21 f.), and nothing can separate him from the love of God (Rom. 8:38)."

The recipe for peace is outlined well in Phil. 4:4-7- "Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."  Rejoice. Be gentle.  Keep from worry.  Pray about everything with thankfulness.  It's a straightforward list but not necessarily easy to do.

So, hope is something to be obtained; God does not fill us with hope until we recognize AND respond to both His love (whose response is joy) and His sovereignty (whose response is peace) that is woven into each and every circumstance. Hope comes from the developing character of Christ in us as we stand with God's peace and endure with joy the trials given us.

This is what I am striving towards.  With God's grace, the work of the Holy Spirit, and the love and support of those around me, I seek hope.