The thankful perspective

10 months... the further back I try to pull from, the more my mind is blown.  There has been quite the whirlwind through my life.  As much as it drives me a little crazy, I'm going to go backwards chronologically a little (perhaps because it makes for a more interesting story).  First of all, I got back from Thanksgiving and have hit the ground playing.  I have 18 students I am accompanying at JU, so between rehearsing with them, attending lessons, and preparing an accompaniment with a clarinet duo for a chamber concert last night (that went very well despite one of the clarinetists having food poisoning!), I've been the special brand of crazy that I like best- playing piano and running from room to room, switching musical gears at the drop of a hat, interacting with all sorts of people.  That's what the next week and a half holds, as most of the juries are next Friday.  I have a couple of students I will be playing for at UNF and if schedules work, I may have a few more even before I publish this entry!  I'm meeting with a production company tomorrow to start the rehearsal process for a show in Palm Coast that goes up in January (more details to come on Facebook after the meeting I'm sure), I've got Christmas music to learn and auditions to sightread, besides Lifegroup and church stuff. . . it's fantastic.  I am so thankful to be busy doing what I love to do (and pretty much busy doing only that).
Rewind to the week of Thanksgiving.
I was able to take the whole week and hang out with the in-laws, out-laws, children, dogs, and quiet mountain peace.  It was great to hang out and catch up, to play cards, to eat awesome food, to throw puns back and forth, and to just relax.  I feel like the sign of a good vacation is when you look back as you are leaving and feel both that it was a long time (and not for the bad reasons it can feel long) and that you are rested and ready to face the real world again, and for me it was both of those things.  I am very blessed to have been adopted into a loving family that, amidst its quirks and differences, still manages to be a close-knit group of people.  I know everyone cannot say that about their family, especially when dealing with in-laws, and I probably don't even really know how fortunate I am.
Rewind to a few days before Thanksgiving break.
My e-mail blows up on Tuesday with gig offers from several different theater groups, one of which is going to pay very well.  Within the next couple of days, several other offers (another theater and then some one-time engagements, like an all day vocal festival) roll in.  I am completely flabbergasted, because there is no reason for all of this to be happening all at once.  God is providing, as He always has.  I can finally quit my job!
... what job is that, you ask?
Rewind to October 1.
Orientation.  The process went quickly from submitting an application to a phone call to a face-to-face interview to actually getting started and beginning to be on the payroll.  I started applying for overnight jobs as Company was finishing up, as I was not yet getting the hours I was hoping for at the university, and my survival mode kicked in (and I needed to keep myself available for the university, because that was doing what I love, and also I didn't move up here for a job but to go to school.  And you can't pay for school on a $0 budget).  So, I took a minimum wage job at Wal-Mart so that I could pay my bills.  I didn't tell a lot of people, and honestly that is something that I struggled with and am still struggling with.  I mean, there's not a job that is below doing, and I always said I would do whatever it takes to make it from point A to point B.  But at the same time, being a 27 year old with a bachelor's degree and six years of experience as a teacher and moving to work minimum wage was rough.  All in all I didn't hate the job, as I was pretty much left to my own devices and it was easy to stay busy for the entirety of a shift.  Although technically part-time, with the commute I was spending 40 hours there and making half of what I did at the private school (so, while I would still agree that teachers are underpaid, I will never again say that teachers are poor.  I have now lived poor, albeit temporarily).   Because it was overnight I was sleeping at any hours I could slip in between accompanying, church, and job shifts.  I wouldn't say it was the worst set-up, but it certainly wasn't ideal.  I prayed one of those dangerous prayers though as I went through the process of taking the job- "If this job is meant to be, then make it go quick and easy, and if it's not, then shut the door before I even get anywhere close to entering."  And so, for the past two months, that was my life.  I was desperate enough for wanting to do more music that I would get off Saturday morning after having worked through the night, drove to a rest area and slept a little, travelled to central Florida to teach some voice/theory lessons, perhaps caught a couple of hours of sleep after that before turning back around to go to another shift at the store, and then staying up to do church the next morning (and then passing out, only to have to go back into work Sunday night).  That is no way to live life.  I know it is partially my lean towards being an artist that looks at that and goes, "Really?  I mean, at least there's some art in there, but why aren't you just trying harder to get gigs?  What is wrong with you?"  On the flip side, the thing that got me through the most was doing my best to be thankful.  Thankful that I had a job that could make ends meet.  Thankful that I still had the freedom to gig.  Thankful that I had a church that I was able to participate with.  Because if I had acted miserable, the job and everything else would have been just a nightmare.
I will admit that as soon as I felt secure enough in the gigs offered me, I dropped the Wal-Mart job.  Though I don't usually act in such a way, there is a point where you go "this isn't worth it anymore."  My position was unique to their set-up, as far as I understood, and they survived for a while without someone doing what I was doing.  I did as much as I could, and when I could not perform my tasks anymore I left.  Not the greatest exit, but it's the way I chose to handle it.

There are plenty of stories and questions and answers and more stories in all of that, but the point of it is this:   Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you (1 Thessalonians 5:18).  I promise you that that "simple" approach will make everything easier to endure.  It doesn't matter if it makes sense, it doesn't matter if it doesn't fit in the plan you had for your life, it doesn't matter if it came out of nowhere: God knew it was coming, and at some point you will see it is for your benefit (Romans 8:28- And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose; Romans 12:2-And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect.)