Grieving: A Biblical View

I haven't written here in a long, long time. And a lot has gone on. For those that may be reading this and not know what's going on, the briefest of reviews: I married the love of my life a little over a year ago as she battled cancer for the second time. She got a bone marrow transplant last May which unfortunately led to an infection this past January that took her life on February 2nd.

I will preface the rest of this post by saying: I don't have it all together.  I've been angry, confused, sad, detached, and there's no rhyme or reason, and just when I think I have figured out the "cycle" of emotions something else happens.  But this morning there was inspiration, so I grabbed it and this is what came of it.

In having conversations with the various people in my life, there is one Scripture that I have held on to in the back of my head:

 But we do not want you to be uninformed, brothers, about those who are asleep, that you may not grieve as others do who have no hope. For since we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so, through Jesus, God will bring with him those who have fallen asleep. For this we declare to you by a word from the Lord, that we who are alive, who are left until the coming of the Lord, will not precede those who have fallen asleep. For the Lord himself will descend from heaven with a cry of command, with the voice of an archangel, and with the sound of the trumpet of God. And the dead in Christ will rise first. Then we who are alive, who are left, will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air, and so we will always be with the Lord. Therefore encourage one another with these words.  (1 Thessalonians 4:13-18) 

There is an important word right at the beginning; it says that we don't grieve like those without hope. But what is hope? How do we get it? Well, hope in the Godly sense is this: the certainty of the fulfillment of God's promises. That statement in and of itself is worth exploring, but for now I'll just leave this reference from Romans 8-

For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us. For the creation waits with eager longing for the revealing of the sons of God. For the creation was subjected to futility, not willingly, but because of him who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be set free from its bondage to corruption and obtain the freedom of the glory of the children of God. For we know that the whole creation has been groaning together in the pains of childbirth until now. And not only the creation, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies. For in this hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience. 

Our hope is that this world is not the end all, and that God is reaching out to us, showing us His love, wanting us to accept our imperfection and realize we can't be good enough or do enough and that we need the blood of Christ to be seen as righteous so that God will accept us (based on Christ and not ourselves) so that we will spend our time on earth living a life filled instead of a life empty and that, when we reach the end of life or eternity comes that we will spend it with God.

But where does hope come from? This is what I've been researching this morning. And this is what I have found: Joy and peace (fruit of the Spirit) precede hope (which, if you didn't click on the link, hope is not on that list of Spiritual fruit).

Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured our his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us. Romans 5:1-5 

(Also, just good stuff: In the future we will become but until then we must overcome. This means we will experience difficulties that help us grow. We rejoice in suffering not because we like pain or deny its tragedy, but because we know God is using life's difficulties and Satan's attacks to build our character. The problems that we run into will develop our perseverance- which in turn will strengthen our character, deepen our trust in God, and give us greater confidence about the future. -Study Bible footnote)

"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." Romans 15:13

Meyer says joy is "the consciousness of the divine love, and thereby the certainty of blessedness, the triumph over all sufferings, etc." And in speaking of rejoicing from Phillipians 4:4- "Paul desires joyfulness at all times on the part of the believer, to whom even tribulation is grace (Php 1:7; Php 1:29) and glory (Romans 5:3), and in whom the pain of sin is overcome by the certainty of atonement (Romans 8:1); to whom everything must serve for good (Romans 8:28; 1 Corinthians 3:21 f.), and nothing can separate him from the love of God (Rom. 8:38)."

The recipe for peace is outlined well in Phil. 4:4-7- "Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."  Rejoice. Be gentle.  Keep from worry.  Pray about everything with thankfulness.  It's a straightforward list but not necessarily easy to do.

So, hope is something to be obtained; God does not fill us with hope until we recognize AND respond to both His love (whose response is joy) and His sovereignty (whose response is peace) that is woven into each and every circumstance. Hope comes from the developing character of Christ in us as we stand with God's peace and endure with joy the trials given us.

This is what I am striving towards.  With God's grace, the work of the Holy Spirit, and the love and support of those around me, I seek hope.